thirteen o'clock

2010-09-14T13:09:00.000-07:00

2010-08-05T11:30:00.001-07:00

2010-05-26T22:56:00.001-07:00

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2010-04-12T20:49:00.000-07:00

Backstreet boys

Danny DevitoJay Leno

Check out this site its great! Or this one. Or this one. You can find the works of such famous impressionists as:

Christopher Hayles

John Morello

Frank Campanile

And Many More!!!

DROP DOWN
This Show Is A Lot Of Fun

From The Year I was Born

2010-03-14T12:32:00.000-07:00

6 DAY TILL PIE DRAWN AND QUARTERLY SUBMISSIONS/FOR BELLINGHAM COMP.

2010-03-08T19:32:00.001-08:00

An old interview with Robert

***!

2010-02-19T12:19:00.000-08:00

But who prays for Satan? Who in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most, our one fellow and brother who most needed a friend yet had not a single one, the one sinner among us all who had the highest and clearest right to every Christian's daily and nightly prayers, for the plain and unassailable reason that his was the first and greatest need, he being among sinners the supremest?
- Mark Twain's Autobiography

Pass draw \ "Ingland is a bitch"

2010-02-03T21:29:00.000-08:00

UW GOLF TEAM IS

GOING TO HAWAII

Ive been thinking about how so many writers today don't use allegory enough, but, I havent been thinking about it that much.

I wonder if I didn't know english if most songs would sound this way

2009-12-02T19:00:00.000-08:00

Smoke Signal Submission

2009-11-15T19:30:00.000-08:00

We want the news not the weather!

2009-11-05T19:55:00.000-08:00

what am I passionate about, Tv dinners. TV is an essential part of the american diet, dinner only second to it, if one were to look at the effects of adding the two togeth it adds up to one sloppy mess. Now if god were alive today it would eat tv dinners and drive in a big car. By golly for every time I have had dinner while watching television. But I am not on fire for TV dinners, or news or much (e.g. scooters, vacation, fall). I guess thats what makes me so dang passionate about them. A typical loafers passion of coarse, if anyone brings them up in conversation this means I might just spill the beans. But that hasn't happened yet because removing your voice deprives us of any cocky aftermath. Plus nobody likes people butting in on their speaking voice.

1994 69

2009-11-01T12:33:00.000-08:00

Carmen McRae

2009-10-12T22:01:00.000-07:00

HUNTERS

2009-10-07T11:49:00.001-07:00

When I shot Hunter's Diet in 1989 I was just one young kid in LA with one measly script and one big dream. I remember my first meeting with Danny, hot from his part as Vincent Benedict wearing a houndstooth fedora and smoking a cheap cigar at the Hardrock

BEFORE I FORGOT

2009-10-06T12:42:00.001-07:00

ELEC. DOUD etc.

2009-09-18T18:22:00.000-07:00

2009-09-03T22:37:00.000-07:00

right and left

2009-08-26T20:56:00.000-07:00

This is all a strange moment

Unusual Patterns Can Appear Anywhere

discovered the first telescope which reaches past the smallest particles thought to compose us.

KINDLE 1984

2009-08-15T22:33:00.000-07:00

Show up late one more time and my ass is canned.

ALMOST

2009-08-11T14:00:00.001-07:00

2009-08-04T15:39:00.001-07:00

Karma Graph

2009-07-29T23:55:00.000-07:00

Bill sputtered out on sunset, the heat was unbearable. "My oh my, world." He thought, "how you have raped my mind. Molding me like clay. If its not the boss, its the tv, or flowers on the armoire, or my father." A car turned the corner as he paused at a crosswalk. The place on Sunset was listed in the phone book as 'Peggy Sue's Burgers and Malts' It was all vinyl and pomp and reeked of novelty. His waiter never shit on Wednesday and Thursday. He would save it up then use the restroom over at Venus Coffee on 15th. It made him satisfied to know the little baristas would have to clean it up. He looked down at his masterpiece and would let the stench waft into his nose with a wolfish grin. Bill ordered a Big Burger and Coke. The service was bad and soon enough the hot mess was dripping in front of him. He had finished the coke by then and was sweating, even with the AC. The mustard and relish speckled the corner of his mouth and in no time it was all over. He thought, "I need to see Eddie and deaden up. He's probably off by now."

Walking with Rooms

2009-07-22T22:22:00.000-07:00

No more cash, after squandering it on his last few motions at night. Bill Booth once again found himself in a bottle. "you know..." "Bill" "right Bill, anyhow you know that last broad sittin' over by Mickey?" Bill paused and splashed out onto the street, a figure of vomit and piss and blood and guts. The world was full of barbeque men and sunday hat woman fettering over spoiled meat on a beach covered in goose shit. He was tired of them all, jabbering on about interesting things and boring things, space and woman, and men and happenings, and he was tired of waking up at the crack of dawn to idiots who would fuck him in the ass first chance received. But mostly he was tired of all the light that fooled him to think things and then fell into obscurity and routine. He stumbled and tripped to a curb vomiting bile. He had always been spoiled.

JOE CAMEL

2009-07-14T00:47:00.000-07:00

looking under a microscope is fascinating

Woke up and fought off the idea that waking up is a dull experience.

The Drive

2009-07-08T17:15:00.000-07:00

At first glance the road smelt like roses. Cynthia's' blouse settled by Jerry's' magazines in the old ford as the clutch burned and the car spun around the corner. Soon they would realize the swell smell was a travesty. Amos Mclain settled the town Points View in 1834, nestled on the highest hill for miles, his ancestor Perry Mclain sold Jerry the car a few years back. It was Perry's nohow that closed the deal. Perry always laughed saying, "I could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman in white gloves." Cynthia had gotten Jerry to go on the trip. Her sister lived across the Cascades. Jerry wouldn't have gone if not for the drive, he hated relatives, his, hers, the whole business was a bust. Rockpoint was a busy tourist destination in June too, especially with the local bicycle race. Another turn, his father had always taught Jerry good; slow into it beforehand, speed up as she breaks. But this time Jerry didn't listen to the lesson, or he was preoccupied. His hand rubbed Cynthias inner thigh and he saw the bicyclist at the worst moment. The car smashed through the side rail right off the side of the mountain. It was a bright day and the biker was far from anywhere. He had always loved a good ride.

LAY LADY LAY

2009-06-26T18:04:00.000-07:00

http://www.spaceportamerica.com/

The Open

2009-06-24T23:07:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAjItY7X0Yc
He slid a twenty across the vinyl top. "You don't have any smaller bills?" The cashier was a fat man with a red nose and bug eyes connected without neck to his shit stained uniform and name tag, Derin. The background continued to whirl with activity as the employees hurried to meet the ceaseless demand.

"sorry bud, nothin' doin'."

Derin had never taken guff from anybody back on the schoolyard, but sure enough he reached into the register and forfeited the owed allotment and what were some of his last bills. Bill pulled his wallet out and shoved the money in. He filled a cup with rootbeer and spit on the floor. No smoking and the bitch working the milkshake machine saw him spit.

"This ain't a barn we're runnin' sweetie. I'm gettin' paid beans and don't need your help to make my day shit!"

"If this ain't a barn then why do I see so many jackasses in front of me."

The obese nuclear family in the corner of the restraunt felt the tension and half a baby started to cry. Bill was picturing her without her form fitting chinos or awful brown uniform. He liked what he saw. She ruined her milkshake.

"We don't have to fuckin' serve you neither, now get the hell out of here!"

"No way, I paid four dollars fifty for a burger and fries and thats what I'm getting."

"You ain't gettin' shit!"

"Then give me back my fucking money!"

"Get out of hear you fat fuck!"

"Fuck you!" He flung the rootbeer over the counter and into the kitchen as he stormed out to his '91 Prizm. It hit a rack above the grill then splashed rootbeer over 25 lbs of ground beef. Ted, the grill cook, dashed out after him and Derin farted.

A kid who started that week asked what they should do with the spoiled meat.

She glared at him, "What the fuck do we care, flip em'."

ASSOCIATE

2009-06-17T00:01:00.000-07:00

I GOT A REPRODUCTION OF THE LAST SUPPER IN AN OLD FRAME

BESIDE THAT NOTHING HAS HAPPENED, BESIDE OCCASIONAL CONVERSATION AND DRIVING AROUND.

'MENT EAT JACK.

2009-06-09T00:21:00.000-07:00

I have been reading and sitting on my ass and shitting and riding on lawn mowers all very well, thanks. I forgot to water my plant over the weekend. My computer is the only light in the room while I write now. Zane M

the house

They are building a house
half a block down
and I sit up here
with the shades down
listening to the sounds,
the hammers pounding in nails,
thack thack thack thack,
and then I hear birds,
and thack thack thack,
and I go to bed,
I pull the covers to my throat;
they have been building this house
for a month, and soon it will have
its people...sleeping, eating,
loving, moving around,
but somehow
now
it is not right,
there seems a madness,
men walk on top with nails
in their mouths
and I read about Castro and Cuba,
and at night I walk by
and the ribs of the house show
and inside I can see cats walking
the way cats walk,
and then a boy rides by on a bicycle
and still the house is not done
and in the morning the men
will be back
walking around on the house
with their hammers,
and it seems people should not build houses
anymore,
it seems people should not get married
anymore,
it seems people should stop working
and sit in small rooms
on 2nd floors
under electric lights without shades;
it seems there is a lot to forget
and a lot not to do,
and in drugstores, markets, bars,
the people are tired, they do not want
to move, and I stand there at night
and look through this house and the
house does not want to be built;
through its sides I can see the purple hills
and the first lights of evening,
and it is cold
and I button my coat
and I stand there looking through the house
and the cats stop and look at me
until I am embarrased
and move North up the sidewalk
where I will buy
cigarettes and beer
and return to my room.

from "All's Normal Here" - 1985
Ruddy Duck Press

Charles Bukowski

Tend to your

2009-06-01T23:13:00.000-07:00

The Archive from Sean Dunne on Vimeo.

Martin the Tailor from Ed David on Vimeo.

Digital Faith

Our Father,

2009-05-27T12:36:00.000-07:00

I've got a summer job lined up now. I took the position of someone going to summer school at Lake Sammamish State Park as a park aide. I've got work from seven in the morning until four in the afternoon. My plan is to wake up at five thirty to eat a breakfast first but who knows if thats walk or talk.

Puddle Career

2009-05-17T21:28:00.000-07:00

Fastbinder Eats His Own Salad

2009-05-11T22:46:00.000-07:00

I was thinking, I don't know. I wanted to, but, I barely have time. Four Mouths eating all at once, but where are the bodies, nobody knows. It smells like fresh scallops. One mouth was shut while three more were open. No room for more but they are all in one room. They can't stop thinking about what they're doing. On one mouth's nose a small man drifted into the scene. He bet a tall man a dime and spit on the floor.

"show me your hand." Said the tall man. The mouth with the nose obliged.

"Ace of Clubs, Jack of Spades."

"show me your feet."

"6"

"Show me your ears."

He placed the desired vegetable before him.

Crease More Curtain Piss

2009-05-07T00:48:00.000-07:00

Crush my Apple Pie

2009-05-06T00:48:00.000-07:00

On the mantle above the kitchen door Wendy had red and blue fish in two glass cylinders only days earlier. The red fish jumped out of a bowl while she was refilling the water. It fell a few feet, hit the floor and gasped. Wendy picked it up, put it back, and, after it died, flushed it down the toilet.

-Expectation Amidst Obligation-

2009-04-01T22:10:00.000-07:00

Great!

Bill Gates is all my phone 24/7, it's a despicable trend and I will soon bronze eye cancer because of it.

MACHO B

2009-03-06T13:29:00.000-08:00

IN THE ZONE:

Worlds Fattest Man Gets New Car

Siberians Find Strange Ancient Skulls

Oldest US Jaguar Dies of Kidney Faliure

Mood Rings & Waterbeds*

2009-02-25T20:49:00.000-08:00

Construction on the worlds first 3G Waterbed is underway

As classes go by quarter S'09:

Oceanography

Research

Nutrition

A mail-man delivers a envelope to another man.

Burt Hines is the man. He had just finished pissing and heard the mail drop through the slot. It was a letter from his insurance company;

Dear Burt Hines,

This is Ray Addle from your Bisco Insurance office. I'm writing you as a friend, not an associate. I apologize for sending you a letter with our letterhead, but I just can't trust anyone anymore. I have been sleeping in the office for the past two days. I pulled your file, B273, and have noticed you didn't pay your premium yet. I thought I would let you know before your policy is put on cancellation status.

I just thought you had the right to know.

To Have and Have Not

2009-02-04T21:53:00.000-08:00

Beetle Bailey woke up around one. After experiment PIGEON 27 had performed liftoff no one woke up early. News was sent from the spacecraft to earth in the martian morning, but it wouldn't make it home until late Earth afternoon. Besides the Mongols everyone was so excited about the government experiment that they all stopped working . The world economy slumped. This lead way to the strongest government Mongolia had experienced since Genghis Khan. They began production on some of the most powerful telescopes known to man, discovering things which no one but the Maya had ever seen in the stars. Beetle Bailey had changed his name in order with the norm of society. He was assigned a number, as there were a number of other Beetle Baileys in the world, 43. The number forty three was then placed at the beginning, end, or middle of his name as of his preference and his middle name was deleted. He chose the fashion at the time and added the number to the middle of his name, therefore establishing some semblance of what would be considered individuality. Beetle 43 Bailey was then changed for the new language of the world. Human beings had for far too long needed an excess amount of vowel enunciation to get a point across in a descriptive enough manor. After the Mongolian government released a undisclosed chemical which they had named "O" into the world atmosphere a phenomenon of telepathy developed in practically all human minds besides the Portuguese who would later revert back to stone age technology from the chemicals affects. Therefore the UN thought about meeting to pass a bill entitled, "The United Language Act of World Culture" or ULAWOC Pact which formally united the world with one language called BooFoo. BooFoo was similar to English except rid the language of unnecessary letters which were unnecessary for understanding. The world Alphabet nursery rhyme went,

B-C-D-F-G-H-L-M-N-O-P-R-S-T-V-W-Now I know my BC.

A famous poet and playwright who used BooFoo as his main creative voice was named Quincy 2008 Jefferson by the government. He was made famous by his best selling play, Ponnoclo of Domontoo, which was sold exclusively on Yahoo.com as a .odv file. The play was about a man obsessed with a lost page of The Constitutional History of the USA which stated whether it was Theodore Roosevelt or Franklin Roosevelt who tried to change the spelling of the word Through to thru. An excerpt goes something like this:

"How moch of ot

os now of ot,

os ot now moch

of onothong?"

The scene takes place on a balcony.

Beetle 43 Bailey's name is changed to Bootlo 43 Booloo.

Yahoo.com became a Mongolian Household name.

Bertrand RUssell LL CJJJ

2009-01-18T15:46:00.000-08:00

FIRsT OFF The Starting line Is Located In this place there are what was left of

AAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDRRNNNNSSSSSLLLLLLWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

The First Burger Was a Bistro

2009-01-01T15:38:00.000-08:00

GOOD WORK 2009

You were one heck of a buddy.

I know I spoke like a joke towards this years

resolution.

SYONARA TINSIL

There is a great Loony Tunes Marathon on the TV today,

Crack open your hangover 18 snatch that peace pipe and roll to the donkey smoke brother.

Time is a funny thing.

ALSO: SHOULD I BUY A MYSTERY BONG?

BONG

2008-12-23T11:04:00.000-08:00

Future Jerry Gets what's commin' to him

See to it that you all are happenin'

Quite A Cat In Bass Amp Ottawa

2008-12-14T11:56:00.000-08:00

Construction continues with a cold front to the north moving straight through the Eastside.

Grade X Cartoon

2008-12-07T23:42:00.000-08:00

By Request:

I've been listening to a lot of Zappa lately. Mostly the Absolutely Free and Reuben. Today I went to lunch with ma' folks.

Number

2008-11-24T11:38:00.000-08:00

I' dtsftuhf dirb ciewfie like old rerunsof zorro on disnek sjicke wo19909 itsgreead,

dcratfch uhtioat i Just have a from coldf...

ICEZ AREANA

WE SHOULD GO ON THAT WINTER MY DREAD IS REALLY HERAVY.

Repeat Stir-Sit Chime

2008-11-17T13:53:00.000-08:00

bundle tip

hearth dust

mint villain

PEOP CY WLE IC

Anandan Shankar Album:

http://sharebee.com/f8ebaa2b

Boulevard

2008-11-10T02:03:00.000-08:00

I watched The Shining this weekend.

that movie is rad.

I think that if I get another dog I would probably name it Larry, Charlie, Murphy, Bernie, or something like that.

Wavy Gravy

2008-10-27T10:49:00.000-07:00

Q: Why do mathmaticians like national parks?

A: Because of the natural logs

Punchline: "The natural logarithm, formerly known as the hyperbolic logarithm is the logarithm to the base of e, where e is an irrational constant approximately equal to 2.718281828" -wik

PS watch this video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VE1HvMadQOI

Democratic Republic of Fu Manchu

2008-10-20T09:36:00.000-07:00

Kirsten got a bluetooth this weekend.

Tinsil played a good show at Hanads'. For the most part I think everything is going well. Besides that I might be in debt with Eastern a substantial amount now.

Habitat 67 Montreal

Today is particularily grey. I'm at work writing this; looking out the window is a nice thing. My life is starting to seem like a giant routine. School tommorow, which I am doing well in, positively in that respect. I have been listening to Erik Satie.

Erik Satie Igniting a Canon

Franz Kafka wrote a letter to his father which was never read by him.

Kafka

Coolsville.

Inspection Direction

2008-10-13T21:39:00.000-07:00

I'm Cavity Free

Parma Heights

2008-10-02T11:00:00.000-07:00

I looked through my writing. Here is a story I wrote when I was seven.

mr cool

'97

By: Zane Myers

Mr. Cool and his assistant Sweeet Mon were two people in the show biz. Mr. Cool was well to do with his own li'l show called: Sunglass Showdown, which was an extremely irritating little show about it's title sunglasses. One way to recogmize Mr. Cool was to see how obsessed he was with sunglasses. Although you may be thinking "What the Heck is this guy writing about," I have a story behind all this. My name is Belah-Boo, and I hate sun glasses!!!?

"Smiles, fetch me my sun glass-protective spray!" I said. Sir Smiles is my assistant, and cook, because everything I cook, I cook incorrectly. He is also my assistant, because he's always got something up his sleeve, and he's good with these kind of...assingments.

"Um, didn't you just use some?" He says back to me.

"Of course but I forgot to spray under my armpits!"

"whatever," smiles replies.

I got in my Bug with the word "Sunglasstink" on the side. Sir Smiles came in with the spray. I sprayed it under my arm pits, sighed, and threw the bottle out the window.

"Code Vroom-Vroom?" Smiles asked?

"code Vroom-Vroom." I confirmed Then I put the pedal to the metal, goin' from 0 to 60 mph in less than thirty seconds.

When we arrived at the Cu-el theature, I got out of the car and took my trustees' shotgun, While smies took his 5gauge Then we snuck into the back entrance. We were in luck. Mr Cool was polishing his third favorite pair of sunglasses, (he has a lot of sunglasses), when We stepped in and said "You're Under arrest!"

Mr. Cool remained cool while he turned around and smiled.

"No, you are," he said.

Then, his assistant Sweeet Mon stepped in and- ruined the story by offering cookies and milk awy to everybody, While Mr. Cool escaped.

"Belah-Boo get over here!" Sir Smiles is saying to me.

Anyways, I suppose my story was rather dull, and short, and had weird names, it was still a story.

So, as I said, I do have astory behind this.

Meeting Vikings

2008-09-28T21:56:00.000-07:00

My weekend holiday was good.

I got a haircut today.

But I don't really like it when people say "haircut."

Why don't they say "hairscut."

Its not like the barber trimmed one hair from your head.

haha

Bulldog

2008-09-24T09:19:00.000-07:00

Now I'm back at Bellevue. My classes are:

Anthropology

Geology

Logic

My classes are 12-8 T Th

Also, soon back to work, at Allstate...

My work hours are 8-530 M W F.

I took Bryce's Senior Picture on the 18th or 19th.

I am intending on finding a camera shop that can fix my now broke 35.

I am visiting Bellingham this weekend as well.

Eagle

2008-09-20T20:53:00.000-07:00

I drove to Cheney today. I got there 10 minutes before housing closed at EWU. It was pretty lucky that I did too, since, if I was there 10 minutes later I might not of been able to get into my dorm. It was a bummer leaving, and I'm not sure if I like it here. Course, I have only been here five hours.

Football:

Eastern Washington played Western Washington Today; unsure of final score.

There are so many backwards hats.

miss yuh.

.001

2008-09-17T22:12:00.000-07:00

I gotta say I suredidfeelgreat. Had a real good day and then I made this.